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by Shirley

I Am a Mother Mountain


A simple photograph can feel

like an explosion of my senses

Catapulting me back 60 plus years

Causing a reflection of my life from the lens

Of a bird looking at the whys and hows

Of my circumstances.

I have to ask why we suffer

I have to ask why it’s necessary

To hurt others.

I have to ask

And yet here the adult stands

Having survived the abuse

The adult has laughed and cried

The adult has celebrated and wept

The adult has lashed out

The adult has loved

And the adult has lost

Loves and battles and children

Anger starts seeping in

My finger pointing at my father

My feet start filling up with a

Vile feeling of hate and remorse

My mind reels with blame

And my lips hold tight in pain

The adult asks do I want to go there again?

Feel the heat of anger fill my vessel?

I have worked so hard at going beyond

Turning my hurt into self love

Gifting my heart with the love I feel

Softening and blending with a higher knowing

I am a vessel of the universe

My voice I use to speak truth

My actions I use to educate

love feels better than hate

My feet walk away from the abuser

My heart forgives anyone who forsakes their

Light in my presence

I am a Mother Mountain

My strength I carry in my tall

Thick walls of stone.

I weather the hottest heat and chilliest cold

I stand as witness to the lives of people

Animals, energies that pass by me

Over me and on me.

I reach high to heaven and am made

Up of the very essence of Mother Earth

I am majestically beautiful and

Starkly abundant in my stature

I carry within me memories of days

Long past and futures to come

Yet represent the presence of what is.

PARTICIPANTS’ REFLECTIONS:

  • Thinking of friend with covid during meditation. Frightening how close it is

  • Since starting this meditation, I start thinking of this group when I wake. Almost forgot this morning. Reminded myself of the 21-day habit-making process

  • This meditation is a good reminder to breathe. I don’t breathe deeply often enough

  • As I breathe out, I imagine it is through a straw. It helps me to be mindful.

  • As I started listening to the reading and heard about the photograph, my mind went to fear. Then I remembered that today I have boundaries, I don’t have memories of my past, only the experience of violent feelings. I learned to replace them with love and with being present in my body. I am at peace and joy now. I choose to live in the now. I don't stay in the negative for long anymore.

  • My “now” is “my mother mountain” image

  • This is my first time here. I was stunned that I was able to meditate, and at the end, I felt at peace and relaxed. This is very good for me. It’s the longest I've meditated in years.

  • Almost didn't come on today. Was in a social media thing that caused me to feel angry. It was abusive. I responded to your image of a vessel full of rage and then emptying the vessel. I feel so much better being with this community in a healing way.

  • I am breathing

  • Today's reading was a reminder of the process of getting kicked off the serenity path and getting back on. Very powerful reminder.

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